I wake up every day feeling a tremendous amount of gratitude and respect and love for a woman that I am unquestionably lucky to have in my life. She is a miracle. I am paralyzed, speechless in awe of her. I struggle to understand how someone like her is even possible, she is so remarkable a person, a woman that I cannot intellectually fathom how she can exist. You think I’m exaggerating—she likely thinks that I’m exaggerating—I’m not, if anything I’m downplaying it.
I am in awe of this woman.
You would think that over time this feeling of, just, absolute wonderment would have settled a bit, that as we have grown more accustomed to, and comfortable with one another that I would have been more habituated by her presence, and aside from becoming more accustomed to, and comfortable with her this feeling of awe has only continued to grow.
She is a miracle.
Valentine’s Day is tomorrow, and maybe the “holiday” has become over-saturated as an opportunity to market and sell greeting cards and other commercial chattel but, like Mother’s Day, Presidents’ Day, Veteran’s Day, etc., being holiday’s of gratitude and remembrance it can also be another opportunity to express to someone you love something in a way that, although it may be commercialized and a bit corny is still genuine; honestly, other than a pseudo, anti-establishment sound bite the argument can be overly pretentious and conversationally dull so I want to take this opportunity to tell her, again:
Elle, I am incredibly grateful and lucky to have you in my life. You are truly amazing: you inspire me, you challenge me, you support and encourage me, you excite me, you enlighten me, you make me laugh (and I love your laugh)...
You are my favorite person: you’re brilliant and informed and perceptive, you’re sexy, alive with passion, I love the way that you see the world (both, for what it is, and for the fantastical that you see, and sometimes try to conceal).
You are my best friend: I trust, and value you, and your opinion above all else. You’re stunningly beautiful; I love your shyness and your innocence, your desire to develop and to grow. I love the way that you feel in my arms: feeling your smile against my cheek, the way that we kiss; I love how we have to force ourselves not to stare too long into each others eyes, because it inevitably crests with such intense adoration that we have to look away.
I love your smiles, your laughs, your walks, your glances; the way you push your pursed mouth to the side when you think, and the way you nibble on your lip when you start to get impatient, or excited.
I love how your moods can change in an instant, leaving me to guesswork and overthought so that I have to work to catch-up.
I love trying too hard to read you and getting it wrong and watching you get frustrated.
I love it when we’re both worried about what the other is thinking, and we dance around it searching for a clue so that we don’t have to ask, because we promised each other that we wouldn’t.
I love it when you walk away to make a statement, all the while silently telling yourself not to look back because that’ll ruin the whole act, and you think I don’t know.
I love the way that your imperfections and your faults have become another thing for me to learn, and to love about you; and how our imperfections only seem to make us that much more perfect for one another.
I love how I can see you behind my eyes every second of the day, as corporeal as if you were sitting here with me; how well I know your eyes, your lips, your face, your hands, and how much enjoy learning you more, every day.
I love the way that your nature radiates from your heart: breathtaking, glowing, awe-inspiring; seeing you that first time, and every day since, it was like watching the sunrise, the most exhilarating and inspired sunrise, and feeling the warmth suddenly reach my face, and my cheeks felt flush, and the day began, and it felt new, and I mean entirely new.
Elle, you have my heart my dear, lovely friend.
Happy Valentine’s Day
I have written both music, and advice columns that covered a wide variety of topics, such as: relationships, communication, lifestyle, business, and life (coaching)